Thursday, December 9, 2010

How to Adjust to Daycare Or Preschool

Many parents struggle with leaving their child at daycare or preschool for the first time. There are so many emotions involved in choosing the perfect place. Even after you make the decision, you have another wave of things to deal with.

Leaving your child in someone else's care can be stressful. How do you know that you can trust the caregiver(s) to be loving and patient? Did you make the right choice? How do you get past the guilty feelings of not staying home with them? All of these things and more can make the first few weeks of daycare or preschool especially hard on the parents. Throw in the child's adjustment time, too, and you've got a recipe for quite a stressful experience!

It doesn't have to be that way. Sure, you will have moments of doubt, fear, or regret, but by following a few of these tips will help you to cope and keep a positive outlook.

Think about the benefits of daycare. Daycare and preschool offer children a unique opportunity to develop social skills that will benefit them throughout their lives. Children that are in daycare learn to follow a group and obey the rules. School is much easier on kids that have been in a daycare setting and they usually adjust faster and do better than other children in some areas.

Try to visit at a time when no children are present to start. Ask in advance if lights could be kept low and noise kept to a minimum. The goal is to have the first experience in the place be a pleasant and calm one. Children explore and discover more if they are open to experiencing it. Noise, harsh lights, other children, and new adults can put them on high alert, making them more resistant. If all is calm, they are likely to enjoy checking out the new preschool toys.

Talk about how proud you are of them for being big enough to go to preschool. However, don't harp on it. Toddlers will pick up on ways to test adults to figure out how strongly they should react to a situation. You don't want them thinking, "If Mom's so proud, then maybe this is something that is much scarier than I imagined."

Your best bet is to pretend like it's no big deal. Don't let on that you may be feeling guilty or scared. Be matter-of-fact when the big day comes. Make the drop-off quick and sound confident. Be careful not to apologize for leaving. Keep the mood light. It's okay to break down after the door shuts, but don't let them see you do it! Children feel secure when their parents are secure.

Talk with your daycare provider or preschool teacher often. Make sure that they know how much you appreciate them. Commend them on their patience and be thankful for all that they do. Comply with their rules and respect their decisions. Don't ask them to bend the rules for you, especially when it comes to tardiness, late pick-up, and tuition or fees. It is important to make the person happy that you want to make your child happy!

Ask your child about their day on a level that they will understand. Ask how they liked that activity table or the other preschool toys. Ask if anyone was nice to them. If you can get them to focus on the positives, then they will have a more positive view of their new daycare or preschool.

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